Saturday, April 12, 2008

Finally! I can test my camera out proper like!!

Tonight Roller Derby action is hitting birmingham again as the Blitz Dames are going to take on the Glasgow Roller Girls’ Irn Bruisers…

I’ve been practicing taking action shots with my camera in anticipation of getting some good ‘rolling’ shots! My past efforts with my phone camera have been abysmal to say the least…I’ve mostly just got an empty shot with someone’s ass disappearing on the right-hand edge. Not good!! Luckily I’ve got a speedy little dog to practice my shutterbugging on…it’s hard to keep him in focus to be honest, but these are two of my better efforts…

Boiiiiiiiing

he looks slightly possessed....

…he loves that tugger…he tries to shake it to death as he charges round the garden, but really only succeeds in slapping himself round the face. Poor stupid little puppy!!

Good luck to both the teams tonight…I’ve got an inkling the GRG will be charged from their bout with the LRG. It’s certainly going to be an interesting game as the Dames fight to keep the GRG from their first away victory! The Central City girls and boys are going to be out in force tonight :o)

Wednesday, April 09, 2008

The Lincolnshire Bombers are...A BLAST!

I am the first one to admit that I love to talk...and especially about Roller Derby! I’m really proud to be able to say that because of my incessant Roller Derby prattle - on various internet forums and with my friends – I’ve spawned (by proxy) two brand new Roller Derby Leagues in the UK; The Bedford Bandits Roller Derby, and The Lincolnshire Bombers Roller Girls. It leaves me with a warm fuzzy glow :o)

On Saturday I travelled up to Lincoln to visit with my friends Emma (aka Sheza Payne) and Abi (aka Psycho Hose Rose), and meet the rest of the girls that form the LBRG. It was a long train journey and I was slightly worried that I’d get myself lost somewhere between Redditch (where I live) and Grantham (where Payne was picking me up from the station), but I braved it out and arrived at my destination with the minimum of stress! I was so relaxed in fact that I managed to bypass Payne waiting on the platform…she had to chase me up two flights of stairs and plant a slap on my ass before I even realised she was there! I’m such a muppet.

Our normal tattoo-talk was replaced with a near-on obsessive conversation about Roller Derby that lasted the entire journey home…and the rest of the weekend!! We were celebrating the birthday of one of the LBRG’s smallest refs, Lean Mean Skating Machine #H8, but in between eating curry and watching old movies we still managed to talk up our favorite sport for hours, as well as getting handy changing some wheels that didn’t want to be changed. As soon as the movie was over and the kids were in bed we stepped it up a notch...watching Roller Derby on TV til the wee small hours of the morning.

Practice was scheduled for 11am the next day, and we awoke bright and bleary-eyed, more than ready for some skating action! I was beginning to get worried as Psycho, Buxom Bruiser and Dolly Lephard (as well as Payne herself) were all warning me how hard I’d be expected to work…and about Payne’s punishments! I made sure that I was armed with plenty of cups of tea before I let them drag me out of the house and to the sports hall.

With a fear of squat-thrusts weighing firmly on my mind, I kitted up in seconds and was on the track in no time, revelling in the wonder of the smooth, fast floor…and thanking the Roller Derby Goddess for Sure-Grip Pushers!! As soon as we were warm and stretched the serious skating started, and for the next hour my wheels never once stopped turning. There was NO WAY I was going to fall prey to a punishment drill and I managed to find some previously untapped reserve of willpower. It was a real baptism of muscle-fire, but I managed it, and I think Payne was all the prouder of me for it!

Later on we got to practice some more fun drills that didn’t require us to skate for infinity…things like stops and falls, running on our toestops, trolley cart races and the like. It turns out I’ve forgotten how to stop again, and I might have to face the fact that my body can only handle so many skating skills…if I learn something new something old gets forgotten! Either that or I’m just not getting enough practice in recently!! I need to get me some outdoor training and SOON!

When our two hours was up and we were all sufficently drenched in sweat it was time to let up and go to the pub for a good old rollergirl takeover! Fourteen of us went for food in the end and so our only option was to steal a reserved table (not ours) and cause so much noise that our food was brought out in double-quick time. It seems that the Lincolnshire men favor Roller Derby attire (even going as far as following us round the leisure centre/car park/pub)…but some of the ladies didn’t seem so impressed at the bevvy of fishnet-clad legs that were wandering around the two-for-one! I really enjoyed getting to know the rest of the LBRG without worrying that I was going to have to do squat-thrusts as a payback…they’re a fab bunch of ladies and I can’t wait to skate with them again!!

Later on, I headed back to Payne’s house with her and Psycho where we spent yet more time discussing Roller Derby, planning skate events and watching Rollergirls on DVD. It was a brilliant weekend and I really didn’t want it to end, but eventually it was time to go catch my train. Unfortunately my journey back wasn’t so great and I spent most of it hanging round on train platforms watching snow fall and wishing there was some food around. Luckily, Mr Gory and I have some kind of psychic connection (at least that’s my story…his version is that he’s Omnipotent and can read my mind wherever I am) and he met me at the station before whisking me off to the late-night wonder that is Maccy D’s! He’s a good boy :o)

Sorry that the promised pictures aren’t accompanying this blog, but I managed to stop myself from purchasing the aforementioned shiny shiny camera…HOWEVER!…on my return to Redditch my will failed and off I went to buy it. I can’t help it, it’s an early birthday present to myself and I NEED it for my holiday next week!! Mr Gory’s whisking me and the puppy away to a little pink fairy cottage for my birthday and I CAN’T WAIT (you can tell I’m getting excited when the caps-lock comes on!)!

Gory out!

Thursday, April 03, 2008

LBRG this weekend!!...

Once again with the blog neglect…but I’ll ignore that fact and carry on as if I haven’t spent the past month not writing anything on here.

March 21st was the Central City Rollergirls’ first band night and charity fundraiser…Bollocks to Poverty! With the help of musical acts La Mascleta, I Hate You More and Slab we welcomed a whole load of people through the doors of Scruffy Murphy’s…

some of the crowd at Scruffy’s…

…and thanks to our event organiser, Block E. Horror…

Block E. Horror…party organiser extraordinaire…and proud owner of hands-free drinks holder!

…and several members of the CCR who devoted their time to baking, decorating Scruffy’s and every other little thing that went into making sure the night went down well, we had a room that looked amazing, and plenty of goodies to entice our partygoers to donate to charity…

bake sale table

…and thanks to the generosity of the friends of the CCR, we had a veritable shit-load of raffle prizes to present our happy, cake-filled guests with…

the cornucopia of raffle prizes...and Daisy holding the most coveted of all prizes...the tattoo voucher!

…I can say with all honesty that the bake sale goodies were gooooooooood…

Gun Beryl and Daisy Pain bake a mean muffin…

…and that the raffle was worth spending money on (I spent a tenner to get the coin belt that Belle E. Dancer donated…and totally didn’t win it! Goddamn!)…

I should have spent twenty!

…and that a non-normal time was had by all…

Eve L. Hart, Chet Wisconsin and Casey Axelrod…and here we see them in their natural state…posing.

Casey and Daisy Pain model the coin chain that I wanted so very very much…

Daisy, Vicki, Jode and Hustle’her welcome Birmingham to fill their massive bucket…

…it was a wicked night. The bands were amazing and I can’t wait to have them back for another similar night soon. We’ve got loads of events in the pipeline, and we’re looking forward to inviting all our new friends back to party in Scruffy’s again in a week’s time. This time Betty Machete has taken the helm and will be ordering us around. I may even attempt something for the bake sale…although I’m not sure we want a food poisoning lawsuit on our hands!! :o)

In the past month I’ve also lead practice…a feat in itself as I had over 25 skaters to wrangle into action. Luckily I’ve got a nice loud voice (trained over the years by much screaming at paintball players as an over-keen marshall) and everyone listened to me and pretty much did as I told…even when I told them we were going to endurance train at high speed for ten minutes. I learnt then that even if they’re willing, it’s still better to keep the time scale as a surprise…for the torture factor more than anything else.

I’ve also been to see the London RollerGirls vs Glasgow RollerGirls bout, Riots of Spring. Once again the CCR travelled down to London in a split convoy, but this time we were cheering for the Glasgow team, the Irn Bruisers, who had our own Daisy Pain and Trophy Wife skating with them. We also wanted to cheer on other Birmingham girls, Helen Fury and Violet Attack, who also joined forces with the GRG in their first ever bout. It was less than evenly matched but the GRG showed serious fighting spirit…I can’t wait to see them in their upcoming bout against the BBDD. We screamed ourselves hoarse, bought loads of LRG and GRG goodies, and I got to see my friends of the Lincolnshire Bombers Roller Girls, Bitchin’ Payne and Psycho Hose Rose, as well as my friend Donna who’s thinking of becoming a Rollergirl herself…keep an eye out for a Disney-Tattooed Rollergirl hitting the track soon!!

This weekend I’m heading up to Lincoln to have a skate with Payne, Psycho and the rest of the LBRG…I’m REALLY looking forward to it…more than I can say. I’ve bought a wheelie suitcase in anticipation…mainly because I just didn’t know how to get my stinky skate stuff up on the train. Most Rollergirls end up with so much stuff that they need a massive bag, and there’s nothing better than a massive bag you don’t have to carry…unfortunately I think my bag is slightly too big, what with it being a full size, neon pink suitcase and all…I might have to scope out smaller one’s for the future before I attack it with a Sharpie and my set of iron-on patches and make it my own. It won’t make such a good holiday case if it’s got ‘Hope N. Gory’ scrawlled all over it in permanent marker.

Hopefully I should have some photographic evidence of my LBRG weekend…but that all depends on if I give in to my towering temptation and buy a new camera that isn’t the size of a house brick…